The Pain of the Heart
by KuroSakura-chan
Summary: Vincent sits and thinks through the pain he lives through with Sephiroth. Not a song fic!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Ack. I either need to write a really freakin' sweet fic or a very angsty one. Right now. No, not tomorrow, or the day after. Now. Ok, you have no idea how hard this is gonna be for me to put Vincent through this.

Ishigami: Don't let her lie to ya. She'll be enjoying it.

Me: Ishigami… I'm gonna kill you…

Ishigami: So you claim.

Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII or its characters. The inspiration for this came from the song 'Swimming Upstream' by Ra. I don't own that either. The lyrics are that to 'Swimming Upstream.'

The bruise on his back throbbed again, making the dark-haired man wince. Though it wasn't only his back that was throbbing. His whole body felt as though he'd been a punching bag at a boxing match. Well, he hadn't been a boxing match but he had been a punching bag. As he lay on his stomach, which was currently bleeding profusely, he pondered what had been the cause of all of his pain.

_"Vincent… Look at me."_

_"Why? Go away, I'm trying to sleep. I'm not up for sex tonight." _

_"I thought I told you to look at me!" Vincent was yanked up by his hair. He yelped as he looked at his lover._

_"Dammit! What are you trying to do! Rip my hair out!" Vincent struggled to pull his hair from the clutches of Sephiroth's leather-clad fingers._

_"Vincent, I didn't want to have to go through this tonight, but…" Sephiroth threw Vincent down onto the bed and turned to the radio. He quickly turned on one of Vincent's multiple CD's and turned back to the bed. He growled when he saw that Vincent was not on the bed but halfway across the room toward the door. He caught up and pressed Vincent against the wall hard enough that the smaller man's back bruised._

Ah, the CD. It was still playing, though now playing only one song instead of the whole thing.

/I can't say I miss you/

/You're always around/

/I can't say I love you cuz you'll cut me down/

Hmph. The chorus. How fitting.

_"Vincent… Do you love me?" Sephiroth asked. Vincent looked at him warily before answering._

_"Yes… I do love you… Why?" Vincent was not rewarded with an answer for several minutes. It took him that long to find out that Sephiroth was shaking with laughter._

_"Gods, you're such an idiot! I don't think I've ever met someone as stupid as you!" Vincent's heart broke at Sephiroth's words._

/I'm so lost and confused when I look at you/

/Your eyes your lips so soft/

/And then when you see me I turn away/

/Cuz I know that I turn you off/

_"What the hell are you looking at?"_

_"…Nothing, Sephiroth…"_

_"Then stop looking at it. You're pissing me off."_

_"All right…" Vincent looked away from the man he loved, the green eyes that were always kind when turned at the others of the house and yet always so cold to the one who shared his bed. Sephiroth's lips were soft when he was smiling yet ground so hard against Vincent's. _

The song started over again.

/And I gotta move on from here/

/I've done all that I can do/

/Yeah, I gotta move on from here/

/I've been swimming upstream for you/

Vincent stood and pulled on his clothes and cloak. He'd make Sephiroth sorry for using him. He strode to the door and pulled it open, leaving.

A/N: Ok, maybe that wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I feel so bad though! Um, this is mainly a one-shot but review and tell me if you want it otherwise. ;;


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Ya know, I hadn't really expected someone to actually want me to continue this fic… I am sooooo confused…

Thanks, reviewers:

aseret kitsune: I knew that you'd appear again! I just didn't know where... Thanks!

noone: (takes the offered Vincent) Yay! I'll continue, I swear! And it'll come clearer eventually... This was only meant to be a one-shot but... (shrugs, hugging Vincent)

whatevergirl: Yup, it'll go on! Thanks that you think that I did well on Vincent's emotions... It took only a couple minutes so I thought that it was rather bad... Thanks!

Disclaimer: I once again don't Final Fantasy VII. There wouldn't be a Tifa if I did. We're back with the fact that I don't own Ra or their song 'Swimming Upstream.' But I love them.

Sephiroth strode into their room purposefully. He was planning on surprising Vincent tonight. What he found made him stare.

There was no Vincent.

Sephiroth growled deeply in his throat. Fuck the surprise. Vincent needed to be punished again. Sephiroth turned and walked downstairs, where Cloud lounged on the couch, cuddling with Aerith. The sight nearly made him sick to his stomach.

"Hey, Seph. What's up?" Cloud looked up.

"Have either of you seen Vincent?" Sephiroth somehow managed to ignore the 'Seph' thing. They had all taken to the annoying nickname. And since he couldn't massacre them all…

"No. I haven't seen him outside of that room in weeks. Is he sick?" Aerith joined the conversation.

"No, he's not sick. But he isn't in there."

"Maybe he just went for a walk. I'm sure he'll be back soon." Cloud assured him. Sephiroth nodded curtly and walked back upstairs. He'd wait until Vincent came back. And the Cetra help him when he did…

Vincent had forgotten what shape his body was in when he had left the house. He was so intent on leaving without being noticed, that he'd forgotten all his injuries. This was one of those rare, rare, RARE times that Hojo did the work on Vincent. His injuries cleared up quickly now.

Of course, now that he was out of the house, a few problems hit him. First, he was still bleeding slightly. Second, he had no gil. Third, he didn't know where to go.

/I'm wounded and hurt/

/And that's my fault/

/But I made my decision with my back to the wall/

Ah, it was nice to recall those lyrics. Man, he really did listen to that song way too much. As Vincent began his trek into the unknown, he wondered how Sephiroth would react to finding him gone. He shuddered as he imagined his vibrant green eyes flashing in fury. But he wasn't just going to turn around and make it easier on Sephiroth to find him. Not now. Not when he'd just began.

And so he kept going.

When Vincent failed to appear the next morning, Sephiroth was still too pissed to be worried. He stood and threw Vincent's CD player against a wall; it had been playing the same song over and over again. Sephiroth didn't know how to turn it off. He could turn it on, not turn it off. The one time Vincent had laughed about it…didn't end well.

_"Why can't you turn it off? You turned it on." Vincent looked up tiredly. After nearly an hour abuse, who wouldn't be tired?_

_"Just because I can turn it on doesn't mean I know how to turn it off."_

_"You don't know how to turn it off? That's hilarious!" Vincent started to laugh, not seeing the pissed look crossing Sephiroth's face._

_"Shut up." Vincent's mouth closed upon hearing Sephiroth's death-like tone. _

_Vincent reached up to turn it off but Sephiroth's hand closed upon his wrist before he got the chance. Agonizingly slow, Sephiroth rotated Vincent's arm around until it was at the point of breaking behind his back. Vincent whimpered as Sephiroth showed no signs of releasing him._

_"Are you ever going to laugh at me again?" Vincent shook his head. "Out loud. Tell me out loud."_

_"I'll never laugh at you again! I swear!" Vincent's tone was pleading with Sephiroth to let him go._

_"Very good." Sephiroth smirked and twisted Vincent's arm more, causing a snap and a cry of pain._

Yeah… Very few things between the two ended well for Vincent. Sephiroth admitted to himself that he loved Vincent. He knew that he'd do anything for the man. It was just… He figured that he hurt Vincent because he knew that he'd never be able to own Vincent totally. There would always be Vincent's friends getting in the way. Taking up _his_ time with Vincent.

Slowly, Sephiroth's anger cooled and he became worried. Vincent never stayed away for this long… And the fact that no one in the house had seen him leave did not bode well in Sephiroth's mind. It meant that Vincent hadn't wanted to be seen and probably did not plan on coming back. Oh, so help Vincent if he found him sleeping under the Shinra mansion again…

A/N: Ack, planning on that story being a one-shot caused this chapter to be thought up in the hours of reading a RikuXSephiroth fanfiction. I hadn't expected anyone to want it to go on. Well, now that it is, I'm making it into a multi-chaptered story! Oh, this is gonna cause headaches…


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Ok, new song! My CDs just never end and thus more songs to help inspire this fic!

Thanks reviewers:

One-Winged-Shadow: Oh, don't say that... I don't need more headaches... But I guess you're right; the praise is worth it. Thanks, here's the next chapter!

atomicsquid: Yesh, tetosterone for my poor Vincent... And I have no idea of what to do with our naughty Sephiroth... Erotic yaoi scene...? And why do they attack in the bathroom where I have extra-strength Excedrine? (sp?)

noone: YES! I HAVE THE COMPLETE SET NOW! Of Vincent and Sephy anyway. I'm glad you're so happy I updated. Thanks for the compliment on Seph's complex character. I guess that happens after you play the game for many years. And yes, I meant that... On the Hojo comment. I realized I screwed up after I posted... --;;

whatevergirl: You're the first to pity me about my headaches... I thank you! And I'm continuing, as you can see. Thanks for the compliments!

Lady Guena: Yikes, you're the first to react like that. Well, I love it when people tell me exactly what they think.

Darkmaster 2: Thanks, not many tell me that straight out.

Disclaimer: I DON'T OWN IT! LEAVE ME TO MY MISERY! By the way, the new songs are 'No Giving Up', 'The Deep End', 'Dead Skin', and 'The Unknown' by Crossfade. I don't own those either. By the way, those songs aren't listed in order. ;;

"Who the hell would be coming the door at THIS hour, dammit!" Vincent could hear Cid's voice loud and clear. No doubt the neighbors could too.

"Cid, ssh. The neighbors-"

"Oh, who gives a damn what the neighbors think! You'd think they'd give me more respect after I helped save their asses from that fucking meteor-"

"Vincent!" Shara exclaimed, opening the door while Cid ranted.

"Vincent? What the hell are you doing here? And where's tall, silver, and abusive?" Cid pulled Vincent in the house, looking around, as though Sephiroth was standing behind him.

"I… I came on my own." Vincent said quietly. While Cid may not care what the neighbors thought, Vincent was a little more considerate.

"Ah, finally left him. Well, you can stay with us. We have an extra room." Cid gave Shara a look and she nodded, going upstairs to set up the room.

"What about the baby?" Vincent sat down at the kitchen table.

"Shara's been keeping her in OUR room. I sleep on the couch cuz otherwise, I get no sleep. How about you? What brings you to our door at two in the morning?" Cid sat next to him.

"I… Needed a vacation."

"Bullshit. Show me your arms, dammit." Cid pulled Vincent's cloak off, being the only one other than Vincent who knew how it came off. He'd helped Vincent through a lot of scraps and Sephiroth… Well, Sephiroth didn't care how the cloak came off as long as it came off. Cid pulled up Vincent's arms and frowned.

"See? Nothing."

"You walked here, didn't you?" it was more of a statement than a question. Vincent shook his head.

"I walked to the chocobo farm. I rode Alex from then on. You remember her, don't you? The gold one?"

"Hell yeah! She was a beaut to ride during the races!" Cid forgot the whole issue of Vincent while remembering the gold chocobo. Shara came back downstairs.

"Your room's ready, Vincent. Feel free to stay as long as you like." She smiled as he stood, grabbed his cloak and walked upstairs, Cid finally snapping out of memory lane.

"Hey, dammit! I ain't done with you just yet!"

"Cid, let the man sleep. You can tell that he hasn't." Cid calmed down and looked at his wife.

"And we wouldn't want to wake little Ari, would we?" Cid smiled when Shara nodded in relief. "Off to bed with you now. You don't need any beauty sleep but I'm sure it helps. I'll deal with Vincent in the morning."

"If by deal with, I hope you don't mean weapons and materia."

"Dammit, Vincent!" Sephiroth pressed the skip button on the motorcycle's CD player.

/Holding on is harder than it seems/

/When you're reaching for so much more/

/Seems so much easier to just give in/

"Dammit!" another press to the skip button.

/So I'm the King of all these things of this mess I have made/

/Such a waste what a shame my whole life is a fake/

/Well I'm a bore and I'm sure I'm a thorn inside of you that has torn at you for-/

Sephiroth about punched the CD player. He pressed the button again. What was with Vincent and all the depressed songs? Wasn't he HAPPY? Aw, dammit another one!

/Can you hear me/

/Can you see any part of me/

/Can you feel me/

/Can you bleed for me/

This one caught Sephiroth's interest though.

/Can't you see me walkin' in your shoes/

/Can't you feel me steppin' all over your soul/

Umm, Sephiroth was confused.

/Can't you feel me walkin' over your soul/

/Can't you feel me wait in pain/

/Can't you feel me reach into you/

Sephiroth almost fell off Vincent's motorcycle in shock. These… These couldn't be how Vincent FELT could they? Oh, hell… Sephiroth put as much speed as possible into the bike, feeling that every second lost could be one less of Vincent's life.

"BAKA! Why'd you leave if you still love him?" Cid panted, facing Vincent's lovely gun. He never could remember the name of it. Death rifle or something…?

"Revenge."

"What revenge are you gonna get if he doesn't search for you? What if he just takes up screwing… I dunno, Tifa or something!" both shuddered at the thought of it.

"I don't know… I just hope this forces him to realize that I won't wait for him forever." Vincent lowered his gun. A big mistake. Cid pounced on him, spear at his throat in an instant.

"You never did listen to reason, Vincent." Cid shook his head. "I warned you all that he wouldn't change. But you didn't listen to me! You! Of all people!"

"I know! Just shut up, I know!" Vincent's red eyes flashed and Cid found himself lying on his back, his spear across the yard.

"Damn." Vincent ignored him and walked over to the CD player, which had stopped. He looked through Cid's CDs before finally deciding on one. He put it in and played around with it until he found a song he liked.

/I can't get out of this dead skin I can't shed my skin/

/I'm not sure where to begin why can't I begin again/

/I can't get under my dead skin I can't shed my skin/

/Can I sleep 'til then/

"Aw, damn, man. None of your damn depressed shit! In fact, listen to THIS song!" Cid got up and skipped the CD back a song.

/So you found out today your life's not the same/

/Not quite as perfect as it was yesterday/

/When you were just getting in the groove/

/Now you're faced with something new/

/I know it hurts and I know you feel torn/

/But you never gave up this easily before/

/So why do you choose today to give it all away/

/Well it's not so bad ya'll together we all fall/

/We shouldn't waste another day/

/Thinkin' 'bout the things we forgot to say/

/I'm hittin' back ya'll kickin' these four wall/

/Just as hard as I can 'til I can't crawl/

/I won't waste another day with all/

/These silly things swimmin' in my brain/

/There's no giving up now/

/Do you really want to give this all away/

/Can't you ever see things in a different way somedays/

/Such a beautiful thing to throw away/

/You should think things through over and over again/

Vincent paused the CD, looking at the ground. They both heard the rumble of a motorcycle engine and Shara's exclaim of surprise. Cid turned toward the house as he heard his daughter start crying.

"I won't let him find you, if that's what you want."

A/N: Ah, damn! I hadn't meant for it to be that long! By the way, this story probably won't be more than five chapters long. That's basically at the most. Don't hate me about it-Chinese Fairy will KILL me if she finds out that I did this chapter before MELTING OF THE HEART chapter 18. Yeah, she's already threatened me with random anime characters… R&R! Also, yeah, Sephiroth doesn't own about anything… He doesn't even see the need to. If he needs something, he just uses Vincent's. Right…


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: My reviewers are multiplying… They're attacking… SAVE ME! (wakes up, screaming)

Ishigami: (snickers)

Me: You bastard of a muse!

Ishigami: You better get typing. They may attack at any time, ya know.

Thanks reviewers: (By the way, that wasn't meant to be offensive. Ishigami is my muse and is trying to save me from headaches. I think.)

whatevergirl: Mmm, I can't reveal what I may do... This story is definitely nearing its end though... If you all want, I'll start another one soon... Thanks!

DarkMaster2: Yeah, that could be the fact that he has Jenova's cells, or because I figured that because he set out the day after Vincent, it would make sense that he'd show up the day after Vincent did. Anyway, it was nice to hear from ya!

Disclaimer: Are these really necessary?

Police officer: Read her her rights.

Me: Ok! Ok, I don't own Final Fantasy VII. It's owned by SquareSoft-(Gets poked) OK! SquareSoft sold out to Squeenix. So it's owned by SquareEnix.

Sephiroth strode into the backyard, finally reaching his destination. He couldn't stop the growl that was emitted from his throat when he found Vincent watching him by a CD player.

No doubt he had a depressed song on repeat.

"Vincent…" Sephiroth couldn't stop the growl there, either.

"Yeah?"

"Why'd you leave without telling me?"

"Since when have I needed your permission to visit a friend?" Sephiroth barely held his temper in check. How did this man make him so crazy? "Or did you think that I'd sit around at your beck and call?"

That was the last straw.

Sephiroth marched over and grabbed Vincent by his hair. He pulled Vincent close and could smell the stench of Cid's house and sweat on him. This pissed him off further.

"You've always needed my permission… You know how I get when I find you gone… Not to mention the fact that I haven't slept in days, looking for you." Sephiroth growled lowly in Vincent's ear. He gasped as he felt Vincent's fist connect with his gut. He let Vincent go, trying to catch his breath.

"You don't own me. I left because I couldn't stand what you were putting me through. You're lucky that I decided to come here instead of throw myself in the Northern Crater. But then, I'm sure you wouldn't've cared. You probably would've just started sleeping with Tifa or Reeve. You're such an asshole." Sephiroth could hear all the anger in Vincent's voice and winced.

"Dammit… Vincent, listen-"

"No, YOU listen! I'm not a plaything, Sephiroth!"

"I KNOW!" that shut Vincent up. Sephiroth stood and faced Vincent, finally noticing the nice, shiny gun in his hand.

Great.

"Look, I know you're not a plaything. I just… I'm selfish. I didn't want to share… You always run to help your friends if they call and…"

"And because of your selfishness, you don't want for him to respond to our needs." Cid walked up behind Sephiroth. "You know, I told Vincent it'd be like this, you tall, silver, abusive bastard."

"What are you-" Cid cut Sephiroth off.

"I helped him with his wounds. I cleaned them for him. I made sure he was ok, then, he'd go straight back to you. The cause of his pain. I'd call that love but, damn, you can't seem to see a good thing when it's staring you in the face!"

"Cid, leave them to their talk… It's not your place…" Shara pleaded with her husband. He wasn't what he used to be in fights, that's for sure.

"Cid. Please, let me handle this." Cid looked at Vincent then nodded slightly and turned, walking back into the house. "Sephiroth…"

"Look, I swear I'll change! I'll get a job, I'll get us a house, just don't leave…" Sephiroth bit down on his pride. Fuck pride if it would cause you to lose someone like Vincent.

"Sephiroth. I wasn't going to leave. I just… I wanted to see if I was worth anything to you… To see if you'd come… And besides, we are living in MY house. I own that place."

"Well, damn. Why didn't you say so before? Now I can kick out the others!" Sephiroth smiled softly and approached Vincent again. He softly pressed his lips against the dark-haired man's lips.

A/N: I think this is it. I mean, there will still be an epilogue but other than that, I think this is it. PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! Oh, sorry 'bout the fact of no song! ;;


	5. Epilogue

A/N: And here we are, at the epilogue. This is it of the story. There is no more coming. If it makes you all happy, I've been thinking of another VincentXSephiroth story I could write. You all have to review or e-mail or both in order to tell me to do it. Otherwise, I won't. Unless I get bored again. That could always happen. It does. And, as I'm being plagued by headaches and various thoughts of what to do for this last chapter, I'm writing it.

Thanks:

DarkMaster2: Wow, short, sweet, and to the point. Cool. Here's the last chapter.

whatevergirl: Umm, wow. You like my work even if Seph isn't totally in character... Thanks! Here ya go.

Disclaimer: I thought you all would have known by now. I don't own it.

"OW! Sephiroth!" Cloud looked up at hearing Vincent's voice to see Sephiroth holding Vincent against a wall, who was glaring playfully.

"Eh… Guys? Could you two get a room?" Aerith giggled, turning beet red as she noticed where Seph's hands were traveling.

"How about you all get out? This IS Vincent's house." Sephiroth really didn't seem to care that everyone could see him molesting Vincent.

"Gross! Go upstairs!" Yuffie squealed.

"What do you mean, 'This IS Vincent's house'?" Cloud asked, confused. Aerith turned to him.

"It is. Vincent bought it years and years ago. I looked up the deed." She said.

"Oh, well, damn. I didn't know that." Cloud looked back up at Seph and Vincent, the latter having successfully pushing the former off.

"Quit being such a dumb blonde, Cloud." Sephiroth definitely seemed to be in a playful mood. He reached toward Vincent's crotch only to get swatted at.

"Later. Yeah, I bought it when I was still a Turk." Vincent shrugged.

"You bought a house in WUTAI when you were a TURK?" Yuffie sputtered as she turned back.

"It was before the war, Yuffie." Vincent stated.

"Oh… WOW! You're old!" the girl exclaimed.

"That tends to happen when Hojo works on you." Red XIII decided to speak up, from where he was laying in front of the fireplace. He and Cait Sith had claimed that area for when they came to visit.

"So… Where's everyone else? I seem to remember Tifa being here…" Vincent looked around. Sephiroth laughed.

"She left when she saw these two screwing in the bathroom!" he managed to get out in between his laughes. Aerith and Cloud blushed a deep cherry red. "But I thought you knew that. It was a couple of months ago…"

"I… wasn't very social." Vincent chose his words carefully. Sephiroth looked down.

"Eh… Are you still kicking us out?" Cloud effectively changed the subject.

"YES!" Sephiroth yelled.

"No. At least, not now. But if I ever hear about more sex in the bathroom…" Vincent trailed off, managing to make the two blush again.

"But Vincent…" Sephiroth whined.

"Upstairs. Now."

"OK! But you're coming too!" Sephiroth proceeded to pick Vincent up and carry him up the stairs.

"Sephiroth!"

SLAM.

That was the last coherent noise they all heard from the room for a while.

A/N: I hope that was ok… Anyway, goodbye all. Review, e-mail, and tell me you want another. Cuz you ain't getting any more from this story. Bye-bye! ;; Sorry about the OOC-ness. It was sorta inevitable. ;;


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